It's Not Rape. It's HBO

I have a bone to pick with HBO about their series, Game of Thrones. If you're not caught up on the series and you care about spoilers, don't read this post.

Still with me? Awesome. First of all, I don't want you to get the wrong impression of this post. It's not about the show being worse because it's deviating from the books. In most cases, I think the show is actually significantly better than the books. My beef is with a couple of rape scenes that take place in the show that are not rape scenes in the books.

1) Daenerys and Kahl Drogo. The very first time they have sex in the book is actually a really sweet scene. Yes, they just got married and Drogo can do whatever he wants, but he restrains himself, like, you know, a rational human being. He and Daenerys still have the language barrier to deal with, but despite that, he manages to ask her permission. And she gives it. And it's awesome.

In the show, we got Drogo turning his bride over and doing her doggy-style while she cries. Can anyone tell me what that added to the story? Is it somehow more poignant to have her crying on her wedding night than actually enjoying herself? Or is it just that we expect young virgins to be unwilling and upset their first time? And if that's the case, I can't even touch all of the things that are wrong with that assumption.

I can tell you what the rape did not add. Credibility to their relationship. Despite their rocky start, Daenerys and Drogo fall in love. This is so much more believable in a relationship that begins with a tender wedding night. If, on the other hand, Drogo can rape her and still win her heart, what are we telling the boys who watch this show?

2) Cersei and Jaime. That scene where he raped her next to their dead son's body was all kinds of ick, but I want to stay on track and deal with the rape, because this is another time that the show has felt the need to turn a consensual sex scene into a rape scene and I still don't know why. Maybe they thought it made Cersei more sympathetic. Maybe they didn't believe that even Cersei would want to have sex under those circumstances. Maybe they thought that consensual sex under their dead son's body was too icky even for Game of Thrones  fans to handle, although that doesn't seem likely.

In any case, the result was the same as the first sex-turned-rape scene: there were absolutely no consequences for the raper. We saw Cersei and Jaime in another scene together this week, and while it wasn't exactly civil, it didn't involve Jaime in jail or missing his genitals (I assume. I should think they would have mentioned that if those had gone missing) meaning he suffers absolutely no punishment as a result of raping his sister. Lovely.

Which brings me back to the question of, what are we teaching the boys who watch this show? That it's OK to rape her if you've already had sex with her before? That is something I find utterly disturbing.

I want to be clear that I'm not against all rape scenes and I'm not against changing things that happen in a book to adapt to a show or a movie. I am merely concerned about the seeming preference for rape (particularly the rape of women) over consensual sex and the way that rape is treated.